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Once you have been matched to your IP(s) (or to your surrogate) it will be time to work out the details of your surrogacy journey.

It will be of the utmost importance to discuss the following topics and ensure all parties agree to the same terms that may impact the surrogacy throughout the journey.

Embryo Transfers

An IVF doctor may recommend multiple embryos be transferred at once. Multiple embryos increase the chance of becoming pregnant, but they also increase the risk of a pregnancy with multiples.

Make sure you all agree on the number of embryos to transfer at one time.

Genetic Disability Termination

Advanced in assisted reproductive technologies have given doctors the ability to determine if the fetus has a genetic disability. When a genetic disability is determined, the decision to terminate or continue the pregnancy will arise.

The IPs and surrogate should discuss their feelings on this topic and their reasons a termination would or would not be agreeable before signing the surrogacy contract.

Selective Reduction

As mentioned before, transferring multiple embryos increases the risk of carrying multiples. Carrying multiples can pose health risks to the surrogate as well as the other fetuses. Sometimes a selective reduction is advised to increase the chances for a successful birth.

Surrogates and their IPs need to discuss their feelings on this topic. They should know well before the embryo transfer if they are open to a selective reduction, and under which circumstances.

Delivery Presence

Another sensitive but important discussion to have with your IPs/surrogate is who will be present at the delivery. A natural delivery will allow for more than one person to attend the delivery, but a cesarean will not. A C-section will only permit one person at the delivery and it is not uncommon for the surrogate's husband to be there.

In the event the surrogate is willing to have an IP in the delivery room at a C-section, the IPs will need to determine who will go.

Breastmilk

Once the baby is delivered the surrogacy agreement is essentially over. If the IPs want their child to consume breastmilk, their surrogate may be willing to pump and mail her breastmilk to them. This, however is not guaranteed and should be discussed prior to entering the surrogacy agreement.

Shipping breastmilk is possible, so the surrogate and IPs will need an established plan before the birth to make it happen.

Relationship

All parties involved have a genuine interest in the process throughout the surrogacy, but their opinions may differ when it comes to the post-surrogacy relationship. It is important to discuss what kind of relationship best meets everyone's needs and lifestyle. There is no right or wrong answer. While some IPs/surrogate choose to maintain a close relationship, others are content with occasional email updates and photos of the child.

The above-mentioned topics are a snapshot of some important topics to discuss when initiating the relationship with your IPs/surrogate. If IPs and surrogates discuss the sensitive aspects of surrogacy that may impact them during the process, then they are on the path to a successful journey.